10 Surprising Things That Happen When You Move Abroad

Tips to Make Life Abroad Easier

Five years ago, my husband and I packed our bags and shifted base to Nuremberg, Germany.

Being an Army kid, I’ve always held a high degree of patriotism and pride in being Indian. I was never really sold on the idea of leaving my country and my people behind just to live abroad. Sounds silly but I’m sure some of you will get this.

But who’s to say what plans life’s got for you? Pratyush (the husband) landed a promising job in Germany. This was a level-up careerwise, and so it was kind of a given for us to move. There were no contentions.

Not to mention that Germany really is one of the best places to move abroad.

 

LIVING IN A FOREIGN COUNTRY

Whenever I tell someone I live in Europe, their eyes sparkle as they go on to say, “Wow you’re so lucky!”

Sure, social media and our glamorized perception of life abroad can make moving overseas seem like checking off an exalted life goal from our lists, but that’s only half the picture.

When I moved overseas to Europe, I knew principally how life was going to be different, but you can never be 100% ready for the changes that will follow.

However, it’s worth knowing that life abroad is way more than the glorified version we’re so used to seeing on Instagram, reading about in books and watching in movies.

No one told me about these things. I didn’t get a headsup so I learnt on the job.

While I have zero regrets, I hope you can factor in these tips when you decide to pack your bags and move to another continent or country.

WHAT DOES MOVING ABROAD MEAN

You see, the movies tell us lies.

Moving abroad isn’t exactly the cakewalk Hollywood makes it seem like.

The messy stuff is rarely ever talked about – hopping around government offices, dealing with bureaucracy, struggling to make sense of a new language, befriending strangers, finding your tribe, staying connected with loved ones back home.

There are so many elements to life abroad that are miles away from the idyllic, romantic portrait painted by movies.

LIVING ABROAD: ADVANTAGES AND DISADVANTAGES

Safe to say that there are merits as well as downsides to living abroad, and tons and tons of lessons. We learn every day. I personally feel hugely different from the person I was, just a short while ago.

This article intends to bust some long-held myths and glib ideas about moving abroad, while also running over the good things.

Because there are good things aplenty.

Moving abroad is an experience everyone should have at least once in their lives.

10 THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW BEFORE MOVING ABROAD

Here a list of 10 things that invariably happen (certainly happened to me) when you move abroad. Brace yourselves for some reality bytes coming straight from the (allegorical) horse’s mouth!

1. You Feel Closer To Home Than Ever

Distance makes the heart grow fonder. Damn right, it does.

Being physically so far away from friends and family and places, basically anything that carries a sense of familiarity, makes you value it so much more.

When you move abroad, you realize that the simple things you probably didn’t care half as much for, are no longer at your disposal.

And just that thought makes you want to pick the phone and call your Mom, or scroll through old pictures or text your best friend.

2. You Miss Your Native Cuisine

While you savor new flavors, your palette craves that familiar taste now more than ever.

Even commonplace food items from your native cuisine start to seem like such extravagance.

Okay, this probably doesn’t happen with everyone, but when you come from a country of loaded and delectable food like India, you’re bound to be carried down memory lane. Nostalgia strikes when you least expect it.

 

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Gorged ourselves on a big fat indian lunch yesterday! No points for guessing the name of the place – Taj Mahal! ?? *rolls eyes in broken German* Hope you had an amazing weekend! #myrightsocklovesgermany

A post shared by T A N Y A B I N D R A (@myrightsock_) on Jun 24, 2018 at 10:51am PDT

3. You Learn New Rules

Nope, not the Dua Lipa song. 😉

Every country has a code of conduct, and there’s nothing that makes you realize that as much as moving abroad does.

Germans are known the world over for being staunch disciplinarians. There are rules for everything. It drives Pratyush and me a little crazy sometimes. But we follow them nevertheless.

We follow them because we’re trying to create a semblance of home in a foreign land, and so step one is to do as the locals do. Even if it needs us to curb the urge to do laundry on a Sunday (Yes, you can get fined for making noise on a Sunday in Germany!)

And it’s not just offenses punishable by law. I’m talking about moral obligations.

The last thing you want to do is to park your car in the wrong spot and piss off your neighbor, even if you’re in a rush.

Remember the time you did that in your home country without sparing a second thought?

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4. You Bond With Your Significant Other

Moving abroad entails change, and change generally brings out the best or the worst in people.

If you move abroad as a couple, chances are you’ll fight and make up and do that a hundred times over till you’ll learn to meet each other halfway, because they’ll be your only family away from home.

Also, you’ll be experiencing a whole new life together, and experiences mostly bring people closer.

Your bond with your significant other strengthens in beautiful ways when you move abroad together.

5. You Survive Bouts of Depression

… and it’s VERY normal. Although it might just as well be one of the things no one tells you about moving abroad.

Like I said – Living in a foreign country is a big change, and it calls for all sorts of adjustments. Sacrificing a comfortable space and striving to create an entirely new lifestyle can often be taxing, sometimes to the point of breaking you down.

There are days when I have major withdrawals, and I find myself bawling my eyes out for no discernable reason.

Then, on other days I’m happy as a clam, sauntering through the beautiful streets of Nuremberg and beaming like I just swallowed the sun!

Two sides to a coin, always.

6. You Get Screwed Over

So you move to a new country, you’ve been playing by the rules, and are being nice to everybody.

In an ideal world, people would do the same to you. That’s how the Law of Attraction works, doesn’t it?

Well, the universe might disagree.

It doesn’t take a scientist to tell that you don’t belong. Your awkward chuckle, the unsure tone – these things are dead giveaways, and everyone you interact with in the initial days knows you’re new.

On our first day in Germany, we walked into a SIM card store and met the nicest person on the planet! He was extremely sweet, and went out of his way to make us comfortable even though we couldn’t speak his language.

After a cumbersome conversation through Google Translate, we bought a SIM card and came home with big smiles, only to find out later that we had been charged an unwarranted EUR 15 for activation (we got this through an online forum and confirmed it with the telecom service provider).

Now, Germany is the last place you’d expect someone to dupe you. But it happened to us! And it happens to everyone in every city around the world.

7. You Break Out of The Spell

Moving abroad, especially in India, has always been massively glorified.

We survived 200 years of colonialism but it sure left us reeling in a grave sense of insecurity, which is why everything pertaining to the West is considered superior by default. Be it the color of one’s skin or proficiency in spoken English.

True, there are better opportunities, perhaps a better quality of life, and definitely cleaner air. But for the most part, there’s nothing glamorous about living abroad. There are challenges, maybe not the same as the ones you’d have in your home country, but challenges nonetheless.

And once you’re over the initial excitement of having moved to a new country, routine takes over. You live like normal people.

You have to pay the bills and you have to make dinner. Life doesn’t magically turn into a Bollywood movie, you know?

8. You Become a Super Host

Moving overseas teaches you to champion the art of playing host.

You have friends and family visiting and staying with you for several days on end, and you go out of the way to ensure they have the best experience.

Your reputation is at stake, after all.

Word spreads! These folks go back and talk about the amazing time they had while over at yours, and that makes everyone back home marvel at how you’ve been acing at adulting.

Totally worth the effort!

9. You Fall In Love With The One Thing

Every place has that one thing that is inextricable to its character. The one thing that comes to mind when you think of a country.

For Germany, it HAS to be the beer. Or the cars. Or the sausages.

Okay, there’s usually more than just one thing.

But then for each individual, there’s that singular attribute that they get hooked on. And it becomes an important part in their perceived closeness to their new homeland.

I’ve always been a beer drinker, but my love for beer skyrocketed to staggering levels when we moved to Germany.

There are breweries in every corner of every city, and you can buy beer in supermarkets, ice cream parlors, even museums. No kidding!

Coming back to the point I was trying to make: When you move abroad, you pick up one thing and you develop a huge liking for your new country because of that thing.

And, of course, this happens behind the scenes. You never know till you know.

10. You Become a Better Person

Once you brave the challenges, stick it out and carve a life for yourself away from your native country, you come out a winner.

You deal with unfamiliar situations, make friends with strangers, learn a new language, survive culture shocks.

Then, one day you find yourself complaining about the traffic or the dismal state of political affairs in your NEW country.

You make yourself at home. You survive.

And all this makes you stronger. You realize that your appetite for change goes up drastically. And so does your empathy quotient. You turn into a more loving, tolerant person.

SHOULD YOU DROP EVERYTHING AND MOVE ABROAD?

All said and done, it’s true that living abroad changes you.

Not always in the Eat, Pray, Love kind of way, but close.

It is enormously enriching and helps you discover so many facets to life and to yourself. But there’s a caveat – Living in a foreign country is not to be made a life goal.

You can’t abandon your present life and move abroad without a plan.

You have to figure out how you’ll make money, you have to work on your language skills, find support groups and expat communities online, research the crap out of the country you are moving to – and a HOST of other prerequisites.

And yet, moving to a foreign country is a goal worthy of persuasion. You have to be realistic about your expectations, and you have to be ready for all sorts of curveballs as well.

And when you have the right mix of mindset and moxie, it’ll be a rollercoaster that will transform your life in inexplicable ways.

 

Have you lived/are you living abroad? Is there anything you’d like to add to this list? Drop a comment below! I’d love to hear from you.